Life without a Role
What if it is possible, for a day, an hour, a minute, a millisecond, to actually not be our mother’s son our father’s daughter, our Aunt Tillie’s piano player. What if, for a moment, we chose to not play any of the roles assigned to us by social and genetic tradition? What if, for a millisecond we even chose to not play one of the characters WE have assigned ourselves in the totally fictional drama we like to call ‘My Personality, For Better or For Worse’?
Can you even imagine life like that? Even if it’s complete fiction the idea itself is extremely enticing. Some people will say, ‘there is no way you can step out of all that patterning because its bigger than just family patterning, it goes back generations, even perhaps including other lifetimes that we ourselves have led Role playing has become the very fabric of who we are, not our soul maybe which is transcendent, but our character, our personality, the way we act, react, behave, think and feel’.
We might have started playing a role, thinking, ‘this will help me see who I am, test my muscular strength, put my emotions through a wringer…’ And soon the role was part and parcel of who I think I am, or at least who I once thought I was.
Enjoying that millisecond beyond role playing would include putting aside the critics of the idea as they play pivotal roles in our cast of characters.
This moment beyond programming has no room for the critic. Annihilating the critical voice, in itself, brings up trouble as it sets off a riot in the internal prison where all the inmates with CRITIC written on their uniforms set fire to their cells, thinking, ‘if they’re attacking one of us, I could be next. I will not sit here in this predictable, boring lifestyle while my boring, comfortable and predictable lifestyle goes down the toilet. Resistance to change is the only thing that still fires me up. Hand me that Bic lighter over there, the blue one. I’ve got to go to work.’
A number of people have written about life beyond addiction. The glories of it, the sublimity of it. But life beyond role playing is the grandmother of all addictions.